Emergency Spanish Phrases

I had a professor in college, Dr. Trix, who had the goal of learning a new language every decade.  I think that's pretty cool.  The next one on my list (after German and [some] French), is Spanish; it's an incredibly powerful and influential language for this day and age, and quite useful in the restaurant industry.

Anyhow, here's a list of basic phrases that beginning Spanish speakers will find useful.  It's funny.